A necessary evil. What is New Orleans without Bourbon Street? Maybe a respectable city? If you have never been to New Orleans, you have to go to Bourbon Street, regardless of whether you want a wild night or not. There is nothing classy about it, but it’s part of New Orleans culture, so you don’t have to feel shitty about getting fucked up on a dirty street in the South. Think of yourself as a mature mother fucker who appreciates history. The road is packed with every type of themed bar, whether it be island or country-western. There is something for everyone. While a lot of the bars are cheesy and most are sticky, there are some places to definitely hit. Regardless, check out the neon lights at night that deck each bar and the crazy people spilling out of each doorway. Never go to Bourbon Street with the intention of just hitting one bar. The best way to experience the street is to bar hop and take advantage of the open container laws. That’s right, in New Orleans, you can go to a bar, grab a drink, and go to the next bar, or wait in the street. This makes waiting in line for a bar much more enjoyable. I would recommend not to get a hand grenade unless you are under 21 because those are the easiest forms of liquor to secure underage. Go for a daiquiri instead. I recommend the Octane flavor for that battery acid local flavor. 

An Irish pub in the French Quarter. Their take on frozen drinks/daiquiris knocks others out of the park. They are famous for their frozen Irish iced coffees, which taste like tiramisu and make a vodka Redbull a really shitty substitute for a late-night pick me up.  

The name is incredibly misleading. A disgusting bar on Bourbon that is really fun. They throw massive Saints games parties that are an absolute blast. If you are doing Bourbon, this should definitely be a stop on your voyage.

A bar on Bourbon that sells absinthe as you can tell by the title. Be careful here as absinthe creeps up on you. There are a bunch of different flavors to try. Definitely a spot on how to do Bourbon like a pro. 

A cool, dark, and damp bar located far down Bourbon away from downtown. Lafitte’s is one of the many bars in America that claims it was the first bar in America. Whether this is true or not, the bar is known for a purple, grape-flavored drink. I believe it’s called the purple drink, and it’s frozen. Probably one of my least favorite flavors, so if it’s not your thing, feel free to get anything else. They have a lovely piano in the back where people sometimes play late at night.

One of the most iconic bars in the world. Pat O'Brien's is famous for so much. They invented the Hurricane, a New Orleans staple beverage. They have a huge patio that is packed at all hours of the day. And they have a dueling piano bar. Guests have to wait in a long line with bouncers that will take no tip. Visitors can request songs and sing along. After going way too many times, you realize that people request the same songs every time. “How funny would it be if we requested ‘Piano Man,’ cuz they’re playing the piano, haha!” “I bet they never play ‘Bohemian Rhapsody.’” “I think I’ll give them ‘Don’t Stop Believin.’” If the piano bar is not your thing, check out Pat O’s anyways because it really should not be missed.  

One of the most celebrated destinations in New Orleans. A world-famous bar that is literally a carousel. The bar is about to celebrate its 70th birthday and has seen acts such as Liberace and Louis Prima. It’s also been mentioned in countless works of literature over the years, including Tenessee Williams and William Faulkner. The bar features classic drinks for many hours of the day; however, it is challenging to secure a spot during peak hours. 11 AM sazeracs anyone? 

A dark bar right off the middle of Bourbon Street. It’s difficult to find and doesn’t have a grand entrance like most of the bars. In fact, it’s a dark narrow hallway. The theme of the bar is vampire sex-dungeon and I do not recommend going alone. They are famous for their German chocolate cake shot. Phone use is prohibited and if you try to take a photo they bouncers will take your phone and smash it.